I seem to remember or misremember from blizzardnd's build that his gray water tank has a pump to transfer gray water over to the black water tank to dump. Just wire in a demand pump on a switch to transfer. I don't think I'd want just an overflow pipe as I would think you would get odor and possibly backwash from the black tank.
I'm not a fan of dumping gray water on the ground, but I know a lot of guys do. Our trailer only gets gray water from the bathroom sink, just soapy water like you said and we do put the appropriate treatment in it, but it can smell amazingly bad for soapy water at times.
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